What is Sarcasm and Narcissism?

Sarcasm and Narcissism!!! Emmm… I’m sorry, don’t mind my manners; Good morning my esteemed readers, hope you all are good and hope the weekend was favorable to you? Well, mine was boring and lonely but I scaled through though. Anyway one of our over-zealous writer #ducheenazopinion is here again and according to the conversation we had before giving me this article, she said she needed to talk about a really funny topic today; “Sarcasm and Narcissism”, you smiled? Yeah, I knew you would because you are probably sarcastic or narcissistic too. Enjoy and drop your comments on what you think below;

According to the dictionary, Sarcasm is “use of caustic or scornful remarks”, I believe the dictionary was being a little bit too mean with the explanation, to me sarcasm is a way to make a person who is acting rather  stupid  realize that he or she is stupid and if the person is really stupid he’d not realize and maybe not understand your reply, if the person is smart and has a good sense of humor the person will get it then actually laugh and reply with even a higher version of sarcasm. If the person is smart and doesn’t have a funny bone he’d get offended and probably beef you for a long time but hey sarcastic people are cool, don’t you think so?

Now narcissism; Mr. Dictionary defines Narcissism as excessive love for one’s self. I do not argue with him on this one in fact I think he is totally right.

I love myself to the moon and back, don’t you? I think I am beautiful, don’t you? Well that is narcissism… Let’s put these two aforementioned traits in one person and what do u get? Sexy…

Unequivocally, the definition of sexy in a dictionary should be someone who is narcissistic and sarcastic all at the same time and loving it… no matter how ugly a person looks, once he or she is convinced that he or she looks extremely good, there is nothing that would not attract you to that person because the more the person tells you he looks good even in a broken mirror you will start seeing how good the person looks from the persons perspective.

Ask a sarcastic fellow if it’s raining and he’ll reply,

No sweetie, I threw some damn water to the sky and it just decided to fall back on my face, ain’t it just lovely?

Then he smirks. You might want to get angry but you know that was a definite turn on for you. My dear, frown or throw a damn tantrum, a guy or a girl that is sarcastic and narcissistic attracts you. I’ve got a friend who isn’t really pretty, not even sexy either but when she looks in the mirror and says,

Cisca, you are too fine

I am like, really this girl… then she looks at me with that sarcastic look on her face and says,

you that is fine what have you gained more than compliments?

and continues with her self-adoration. It actually worked, whenever I look at her picture on my phone all I see is a beautiful girl… I also met this guy that is cute and addicted to mirrors. When he looks at the mirror he tells himself how cute he is and no matter how hard I try I can never stop seeing how cute he just looks. Whenever he replies a comment, its epic and I believe it’s one of the reasons he has so many girls around him, damn! He’s so annoying.

I told a guy who works with me that the chairs in a place were bad and unsafe, he smiled and told me he was going to refer me to the maintenance section of the office where I work so that I could tell them that the chairs were bad, it made me laugh and I simply called him an ass and walked away after which he called after me and said,

it’s a good thing you know.

I just shook my head and kept walking, didn’t need him to know how impressed I was at him.

Honey when you are sarcastic and narcissistic, you so cannot have a low esteem, you cannot be intimidated, you cannot be insulted because everybody that tries to make you feel bad knows that it’s like pouring water on rock, while those that don’t know you regret the attempt immediately. One guy asking me out once told me, (probably meaning to insult me) that

big girls don’t run away from toasters, they face them

I replied,

I didn’t realize you were a toaster, dude I actually had bread this morning that needed toasting.

It drove him crazy, dude is still crazy about me till today.

Narcissism and sarcasm builds your self-esteem, it leaves people yearning for you, it even helps with your flirting skills, and it’s nice to go all Cookie Lyon on people who thought they could intimidate you. You wanna know why Lucius Lyon and Cookie still remains my best Empire characters? It’s simply because you can feel the sarcasm and narcissism oozing from around them.

Make friends with a sarcastic and narcissistic person today, they would help you boost your ego and try not to get angry with them when they throw one at you, instead prepare a dope comeback and throw it at them if you can’t, let them know you were impressed and you’d like to learn *whispers* don’t let anybody hear but that’s their only weakness.

Love you all and see you next time, it’s still #ducheenazopinion

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